I Like Work Better Than People

I like work better than people. There, I admitted it!

It sounds funny, right? Maybe even a little antisocial. You might be imagining a recluse with food slid under the door or a Scrooge hoarding money. But that’s not what I mean at all.

The reason is simpler: I like being challenged in ways I can track. I prefer tasks with visible results. I know what I’m getting with work; the rules are clearer. With people, there’s far more variability, and that unpredictability can feel exhausting or frustrating.

Why Work Feels More Comfortable

I’m not alone in this. Many people get more satisfaction from work than from interpersonal relationships. High achievers, in particular, are drawn to metrics and measurable progress. They like to know how they’re doing and when to adjust strategy — feedback that work reliably provides.

At work, you immerse yourself in a task and see results, or at least indicators of progress. Expectations and outcomes are defined. Even failure comes with data and direction. Wins are clearer. Losses are explainable.

With people? No scorecards exist for friendship, parenting, or partnership. You can invest enormous effort and still have no idea whether it’s “working.” The ambiguity alone can be draining.

We’re Often Less Stressed at Work Than at Home

Multiple studies show people are frequently happier and less stressed at work than at home. Cortisol levels — a key stress hormone — tend to be lower during work hours. This is partly because our brains struggle to switch gears. After a full day of professional focus, being suddenly thrust into emotional, relational, and logistical demands can feel destabilizing. The lack of transition time makes home life feel overwhelming rather than restorative.

What We Choose to Celebrate

Our culture prizes professional success far more than relational success. We celebrate promotions, deals, completed projects, and revenue milestones — but rarely the quiet, consistent labor of good relationships.

We don’t profile people for being exceptional friends or deeply present partners. When interpersonal excellence is celebrated, it’s usually framed as an admirable add-on to career success — not as worthy on its own.

This reinforces the belief that work is hard and relationships should be instinctive. But that’s rarely true. We train endlessly for careers and barely at all for emotional intelligence.

People Are Work, Too — Just a Different Kind

Relationships require effort, patience, and skill — but they don’t come with dashboards or performance indicators. They fluctuate unpredictably. One day they energize us; the next, they stretch us thin.

Still, we can’t do life alone. We go faster solo, but we go further together. When work falters, it’s people who remind us of our worth. When momentum slows, it’s relationships that sustain us.

A strong social life is correlated with better health, lower stress, and greater well-being. Success at work often depends on people as well — partners, customers, teams, mentors, investors. The self-made solo entrepreneur is largely a myth.

Learning how to be good with people begins in our personal relationships: where vulnerability is allowed, mistakes are forgiven, and growth is nurtured.

Not Everything That Counts Can Be Counted

As William Bruce Cameron put it: “Not everything that counts can be counted.”

Just because relationships don’t come with analytics doesn’t mean they matter less. The absence of metrics doesn’t diminish their value.

Balancing Work Mode and People Mode

The challenge isn’t eliminating our love for work — it’s learning how to show up fully in both arenas.

When you’re with people, be present. Minimize distractions. Let that time be real.

When you’re working, immerse yourself completely. Make your hours focused and meaningful so you’re less tempted to bleed work into personal moments.

Set boundaries. They’re not selfish — they’re strategic. Boundaries reduce guilt, preserve energy, and allow each part of life to feel richer.

Ultimately, the balance isn’t between work and relationships — it’s between short-term satisfaction and long-term fulfillment. Work may energize us today, but relationships sustain us over time.

And honestly? It’s a lot less joyful to celebrate your big milestone alone at your desk.

Work is measurable. People are meaningful. And the most fulfilled lives learn to honor both.